Daily Prompt: Happy Endings

Tell us about something you’ve tried to quit. Did you go cold turkey, or for gradual change? Did it stick?

 

I tried my first cigarette when I was 10. I didn’t like it.
Something changed between then and graduating high school.

I’d been a smoker off & on since I was 18 years old. I started because my first boyfriend did it. I thought it was cool. After some time, whenever I was under pressure or a lot of stress, I would smoke. When I faced adversity I would chain smoke. After breaking off the relationship, my smoking slowed down and I stopped for awhile.

A few years later I was in a new relationship & eventually married.
Things were great… for a few months anyway. Then the abuse started.
I started smoking again. I gained weight. I hid my smoking from him, because he didn’t like it and I knew it would get me in trouble. Eventually he did find out and told me I HAD to quit. Who was he to tell me what to do?
I lied and told him I quit, but with the stress of the relationship, of course I hadn’t. It was my crutch. Eventually I was smoking about a half a pack per day.

Two and a half years later I was done with him. I continued to smoke, slightly less than half a pack per day. But it was an addiction by now. Even though I knew it was unhealthy, I didn’t want to quit. Yeah I had seen pictures and ads of what smoking does to the heart and lungs, but I didn’t care. I hated myself & didn’t care if I lived or died. And no one would care anyway if I did.

Several months later I met a guy who seemed really nice. He was a smoker like I was. We ended up getting together. I met his parents, but we didn’t get along very well. More smoking… back to half a pack per day. (We actually lived with them for awhile).
Some time later I got pregnant. Smoking and pregnancy don’t mix, so as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I quit. My husband promised me he’d quit before our son was born. He didn’t.

(Now in another state) Two and half years after our son was born, our daughter was born… still smoke free. But I was angry that my husband didn’t keep his promise.
Several months later I started smoking again, because he didn’t quit (stupid decision).

(Moved back to hubby’s home state–and the outlaws property)
I smoked for maybe a couple of years and then quit… again. The “out-laws” seemed happy about that.
A year or so went by, then we had some problems with the ‘out-laws’, and I started again. Apparently one day my MOL asked hubby why I had started smoking again. He told her flat out, “Because of people like you!” and he walked away. It was July 3, 2012 when I started again.

I made a promise to my kids, that as soon as we were in a different place, that I would quit smoking. August 19, we were in a new ‘residence’. I didn’t quit right away but I was determined to keep my promise.

The week before Thanksgiving, November 17, 2012 I had my last cigarette. I have been smoke-free for 14 1/2 months now.
I plan to stay that way, for life.

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